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Life PuzzleMy life is a puzzle I have yet to find the time to finish,
it feels like it's going to take an eternity,
I just wish more if it fit together,
it's been left out on the table, pieces scattered, for another day,
wishing somebody would come along and help me sort it out,
and I swear I'll come back and finish it, I'm just a little tired now,
I try and sleep, but my dreams keep me awake, they always keep me awake,
I just breathe in deeply and count the paint drips on the ceiling as if they were stars, making wishes every now and then, finding the constellations in the faux sky,
and every time I look, it's as if someone has rearranged the pieces,
if only they would rearrange my life into something that made sense,
instead of throwing the pieces all around, losing them under unmoved furniture, sticking to the bottoms of shoes and being carried far far away, buried under the lives of others,
but now the clouds don't spell out my emotions anymore,
forever changing c
Woke up in HellI just wanted to go to sleep.
Because I knew that sleeping would mean dreaming. Dreaming meant I could be right there beside him, laughing, smiling, living. Dreaming meant I could see him, hear him, touch him. Dreaming meant I didn't have to wait any longer.
I just wanted to go to sleep.
Because my paint kept spelling out his name, over and over. Every song serenaded me with his voice. My tears screamed too loud for me to rest, and the smell of his soap lingered on my bed even though he had never been there.
I just wanted to go to sleep.
Because when I did, I would dream of how his hair looked when he just woke up, or when he ran his fingers through it absentmindedly. I would dream of his contagious smile, and the way he calls everybody "dude".
And when I woke from my dream, I would be in hell.
(don't) forgettick tick
imaginary clock in my head.
You are so far away,
and the time goes by so slow,
my head buzzes,
my heart aches,
Why does hope feel so far,
but look so close?
They days drag on,
the cold covers me,
like the snow that falls here,
chills me completely,
Of you and me.
I ache when I wake up,
this pain is so strong,
my fear is real,
End The DistanceThe late night is the worst,
When the house is silent
and everyone has gone to bed
I lie awake
Imagining the curve of your lips,
Or the feel of your skin against mine,
When the empty space
next to me,
Seems to extend
for thousands of miles,
I hate those miles,
In the night,
In the dark,
When I’m all alone,
And I’ve only got memories
to carry me through,
To the next day,
Or the next string of days
that seem to last forever,
but they finally end
With me lying in bed,
Next to you.
Just...YouWhen I say "I miss you" it isn't just words,
Not characters on a blinking screen,
Not shallow motives sent through text,
Shimmering and breaking through invisible spaces,
Navigated by cell phones and computers,
I miss you,
Every second of every day,
Through dreams and daydreams alike,
I suffer everyday,
Suffer from a lack
A lack of you,
Being close enough
Close enough to touch,
I just want to be close to you,
Just come be close to me.
When I say "I miss you" they aren't just words,
A shivering shudder runs through my soul,
Consistently brushing my heart,
Which chases shadows away
With the thought of your presence,
It's an overflowing emptiness,
Having you so far away,
But still it feels the same
when you fill the fractures in me,
Equal bits of completion
Complete the empty void,
Void which is constantly in fluxm,
I just wish you were here.
You complete me
Distance.I wish that when you hugged pillows
they acted like teleportation devices,
And when you clutched yours
It would put me beside you,
I wish my blankets
Were like magic carpets,
And we could use ours
To fly to one another,
I can show you the world,
I wish our computer screens
Would let us reach to one another,
Then I could pull you through
straight into my arms,
I wish we could feel each other
When we clutch pillows and blankets,
And pretend they're each other
So our dreams can somewhat come true,
I can't love you this much baby, and love you from this far.
Happy?When in our eyes
The heavens fall,
falling, falling, falling,
down, falling down,
And shredded clouds softly float,
Like frozen snowflakes to the ground,
colorless cotton candy, cold,
Our sorrows litter these dismal streets,
Like crumbled newspapers filled with yesterday's news,
thrown aside, forgotten 'til another day,
Black and white will not show the red that I bleed,
My scars aren't for you to see,
I will tear my paper heart into tiny pieces,
And dance in the confetti of my despair,
If only you were here,
maybe I wouldn't feel so alone,
I close my eyes and imagine you standing there,
I clamp my fingers around yours,
but when my eyes open, there's just empty space,
and my hand is cold,
frozen like the snowflakes on the ground,
Shivering, I wrap my arms around myself,
pretending you're here
I don't even know what your voice sounds like,
but you make me happy,
I wish knew how to show you I care about you,
that you make me happy,
I want to make you
BetterThe rain streaks past her haunted eyes,
Sliding quickly down the panes of glass,
leaving blurry streaks in her vision,
Mimicking tears sliding down her cheeks,
The thunder growls fiercely overhead,
Echoing the anger and pain in her heart,
Which battles to keep the loneliness at bay,
It wasn't supposed to end like this,
Her eyes flash like lightning in the clouds,
When she hears the phone vibrate on her desk,
An unnatural sound breaking through the storm,
she picks it up, new tears falling like rain,
He tells her goodbye for the last time,
answering, she pleads for him to let he back in,
Into his heart, and into his home once again,
but it's already over,
She begs and pleads, asks for forgiveness,
But his heart won’t forgive her hurtful words,
her spontaneous, selfish actions,
The mind that caused the rift between two souls,
The thunder growls again, and she throws her phone,
It's thud blending in with the thunder,
Going back to her window, holding herself tight,
Watching, but not
Dreams the moon is full.
It shines brightly for two people whose hearts beat as one,
they sleep and dream of each other.
In my life this is what happens between you and me even if we're worlds apart,
When I look up at the moon I see your smile,
When the night winds blows I hear you whisper my name,
When I close my eyes I can feel your arms around me,
hugging me close, enveloping me like the ocean waves,
In my dreams I feel you hold me close,
I wish that I was right there next to you,
I gaze up at the stars with my eyes full of wonder,
curious as to what star you are under,
there isn't one night I don't wish I was with you,
Although I'm terrible at explaining my feelings,
to you I can't deny the unbending feelings I have for you,
We are the same in almost every way,
I have the urge to be by your side forever,
Can you hear the song of the night creatures singing their lullaby for us?
The moon shines on the both of us even though we're miles apart,
but if I close my
Cold Hands, Warm HeartYou spent the day telling me
That I'm hot when I'm cold,
That I look pretty with my hair wet,
That I'm fast in water,
That I'm your little fishy,
As I sped through the river's current.
You cuddled me, hugged me,
I'm finally sure you love me,
And yet I manage to push you away.
You know my hands are freezing cold,
Did I warn you that my heart's the same?
Cold hands, warm heart, I've been told,
I guess for me, it's not the same.
I didn't believe in angels until I met you,
I know you're one.
But not the kind with wings or halos.
Your aura is woven with beams from the sun,
Yet I'm a dark creature, dwelling in shadows.
I'm sorry I got mad at you for a stupid little thing,
And I know my words sting.
I know my hands are freezing, and my heart's the same.
But I love you with a passion, and in my heart is a flame.
you tasted like mintI remember the way you stared into my eyes
in the front seat of your car.
Our favorite song was playing on the radio
and you were driving me home in the rain
because I didn't have anyone else who could give me a ride.
You parked your car in my drive way
and we watched the rain drops race down the windshield.
You had kissed me goodbye before I got out
and I waved as you drove away.
And for a while, it seemed like I couldn't get the taste
of your minty lips out of my mouth.
Sorry Only Says So MuchThere is a particular tension in the halls of a high school.
The eyes of two young souls meet-
Two lost souls.
One was broken beyond repair, with scars that would make the eyes of the strongest man drool.
One was the one who made that feet.
Two rotten souls.
When they see each other,
They both- at the very least the culprit-one- contort their chests.
They avert there eyes and their hearts drop.
It's like they want to cry from the pain,
But also from the joy of the past all over again.
Now the evil one,
The one who gave the other so much pain,
Stays up at night, torturing herself,
Clinging to torn pictures and rotten petals,
Listening to old songs and reading through old messages,
Regretting the past.
She knows she can't change what she's done.
She knows there won't be a reset this time.
It's just the most painful thought in her mind.
She wonders if the other ever thinks the same.
She wonders if the other ever utters her name.
There isn't much else she can do now to begin a friendship,
SempiternalShe says that
love is like a rose bush,
once you're caught
in its embrace
there is no escaping
for if you try to escape,
the thorns will catch you and
only hurt you more.
She says she will never try to escape from their rose bush.
He makes his vows with another.
The cake is set, the moon is lit,
They found her in a rose bush,
blood flowing out like a river.
Drowned in his love, forevermore.
jawlinesher name was Jules-short-for-Julianne and she tasted of the grape gum that comes in packs of eight, the kind tucked away on the shelf at the Grocery & Gifts on 21st and Hawthorne,
and I didn’t know I was supposed to close my eyes.
she traced my spine with her teeth (I figure now she was trying to crack it open, let my marrow spill over her lips)
the stars leaning in when we kissed looked like rice, honest, not wishes or dreams or satellites,
two girls collided on a sidewalk, boots drenched in gasoline puddles that glistened scarlet aquamarine gold, trying to find something with their tongues
but we fooled nobody.
Ever Contemplating I have so many options,
but at the same time,
I have none.
As much as I wanna leave,
I think I might have to stay
right where I am.
someday it will happen:
we'll be on our own
you just have to wait.
I have to finish some things
before we can start:
before we can disappear
and live in our little shack
by the beach in paradise
with just enough to get by.
Playing music on the street
to get something to eat;
just to stay alive.
Although the melodies
keep our hearts beating
and the breaths we take going.
Screaming out our lungs
trying to bring back grunge,
with all our clothes
covered in studs.
Kaoru x Chubby reader: You're not fat.
You were hanging with at the Hitachiin mansion with the rest of the Host club members on a Friday night hanging out after a very long day at school.You were bullied at school but for a peculiar reason.You were a bit chubby.You weren't skinny,but you weren't fat either.Although,you do feel fat most of the time.Most girls at the school were- wait let me rephrase that,EVERY girl at the school was skinny except for you.You had trouble losing weight in the past.You had a strict diet and excercised daily.It was a very slow process but the pounds were skimming off....just not fast enough.Because of being chubby and being self consious you didn't have much friends.However,Kaoru Hitchiin was the first person to become your friend when you came to Ouran.You met the host club after that and became great friends.Haruhi and Kouya are the only ones who knew that you're being bullied by your weight but neither you or them really mentioned it much.You smiled lightl
send me letters instead of text messagesi.
hold me close to your heart;
make me laugh when i'm upset
and protect me when i feel scared.
make me feel like i'm
important to you.
send me letters in the mail
that contain poems that you wrote just for me
and tell me about how you go to
the bookstore every other weekend, hoping that
you can find something for me to read.
tell me about how you want to
go to college after we graduate
and study chemistry like you said you would,
and rant about how much you love science
even if i'm not interested in science,
because i love that you're so passionate about something
and i just love listening to your voice
when you're happy.
One of These DaysOne of these days
I’m going to walk up to you
And know exactly what to say.
The things is though,
You take my breath away
And I’m not good at conversation anyway.
One of these days
I’m going to walk up to you
And tell you exactly how I feel.
I’ll walk up to you
And have my words make you feel loved
Just like you do for me.
One of these days
I’m going to tell you
How happy you’ve made me
And what a difference you’ve made in my life
If only I could speak in poetry
Then I might be able to communicate better.
But I can’t
So I’ll just have to find a way to keep my words
When they aren’t on paper.
But I will
I’ll tell you
I’ll find a way to talk to you
One of these days.
Rain FireI stood outside in the rain today. I know it sounds cliché, but the steady drumming of raindrops drowned out the beat of my heart.
I've never felt as complete as I did then.
Let's just pretend that I didn't break your heart. I'll bandage my bleeding knuckles and go find that fake smile I wear so well.
I won't be lonely. We'll pretend I'm happy standing outside in the wet; these are raindrops, not tears. I'll give you every excuse I have to offer, and someday when the rain clouds disappear I'll realize that I'm just talking to the sky.
I've run out of words, you know. I can feel it.
When it started raining last night I burned all of my poetry books. Page by page. I can only remember one line:
"I know just how it feels
to think of the right thing to say too late."
When I think of the right words, I'll write them down. And leave them for someone to set on fire.
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Endorell-Taelos is very well known within the community for her selfless giving and gracious community spirit. Since joining DeviantART over seven years ago, Alicia has continued to make a positive impact on many deviants. Her helpful and thoughtful approach was one of her finest attributes when serving as a Community Volunteer, and this has continued throughout the many contests which Alicia provides on a regular basis. As we approach our Birthday celebrations, we can't... Read More